How New Yorkers Know You're a Tourist

So it's your first trip to the Big Apple, but you're a little antsy because of the reputation Gothamites have for being, well, unforgiving, and would like to learn how to blend in. Have no fear. Peruse these, some of the most common mistakes tourists make in New York City, and you'll never again stick out like a hot buttered corn cob in the middle of an Iowa December. (By the way, never say that in New York.)

You Gawk at the Celebrities
New Yorkers just ignore them, like they do everyone else.

You Ask for Directions to the Empire State Building
In most cases, you just have to look up.

You Ask the Quickest Way to Get to the Statue of Liberty
Depends how fast you can swim.

You Refer to Times Square as 'Downtown'
Yes, the downtown district in many a metropolis is its lively cultural and commercial center, but in New York City, "Downtown" generally begins south of 14th Street. Times Square is firmly in Midtown.

You've Got the Subway Map Out
New Yorkers would rather walk an extra 10 blocks than admit they don't know where they're going.

You Refer to the Subway Lines by Their Color
This ain't Boston. If you mean the 1 and the 9, say so -- not "the Red Line," which is not only less precise but also so ... Bostonian. (And if you do want to take the 9, you need to buy a new map. Just don't unfurl it in public.)

You Can't Get the Metrocard Swipe Down
Sympathies all around here -- even New Yorkers sometimes have trouble with the farecards, which you're frequently admonished not to swipe too fast or too slow. If you've taken more than three or four swipes and still can't get that satisfying clicking "Go" sound, just step aside and let the people behind you go through before you try again.

You're Intimidated by a Little Stroll
If you can't handle a seven-block walk to Point X without hopping into air-conditioned motorized transport, your next trip should probably be to L.A.

You Take Up the Whole Sidewalk Yet Walk Very Slowly
If you insist on taking up the entire sidewalk with your phalanx of tourism, at least keep up a quick pace, please. The people behind you have places to be.

You're Baffled by the Taxi Lights
If the "off-duty" lights (the ones on the side) are lit up, the cab is off-duty. If the medallion number (the one in the middle) is lit up, it means the cab is free. If nothing's lit up, the cabbie already has a fare. Don't bother trying to hail a cab unless only that middle one is lit up.

You Don't Know How to Hail a Cab
No whistling, showing your leg, jumping up and down, or any of those other shenanigans. Just walk a safe distance into the street (if need be), look your target in the eye, and put out your arm.

You Order a Cosmo
Real New York has no relation to Sex and the City besides the backdrop. No one's ordered cosmos here since the mid '90s. And, no, every fourth woman is not an oversexed, foul-mouthed cougar.

You Get Lunch at Some Place That Boasts of 'Real New York-Style' Pizza
If some pizzeria is bragging about how it offers up a "real New York slice," guess what: It doesn't.

You Ask for a Coney at Coney Island
This ain't Michigan. So-called "coney dogs" are just called chili dogs in Coney Island. Same idea goes for "New York-style" pizzas, ice cream, bagels, cheesecake, sandwiches, delis, etc., etc.

You Don't Tip Enough
New Yorkers are generous tippers compared to many other parts of the country -- 15 percent is somewhat insulting for most dinner service.

You Ask If It's Safe to Go to Harlem, Etc.
Yes, and the subways, Central Park, and almost every other part of New York are perfectly safe, too -- as long as you're not an idiot. Remember: New York is the safest big city in America. New Yorkers are the ones who are afraid when they visit someplace else.

You Pronounce 'Houston' Like the City
It's HOW-stun Street, not HYOO-stun Street. Also, no one calls Sixth Avenue "Avenue of the Americas" no matter what it says on the street signs. And it's GREN-itch Village, not GREEN-witch Village, but you shouldn't be calling it "Greenwich Village" anyway unless you're a beatnik.

You Make Plans to Meet 'in Central Park'
Not that New Yorkers don't make this mistake all the time, too, but you're going to have to be much more specific than that. The park is big.

You're Dressed ... Off
It's hard to pin down what you're doing wrong here, for various reasons, but suffice it to say that, in New York City, you'll rarely go wrong with black.

You Assume Everything to See Is in Manhattan
The residents of the other four boroughs would beg to differ.

You're Afraid to Ask Questions
Forget the stereotype of firebreathing New Yorkers who'll bite a stranger's head off. They may be brusque and to the point, but New Yorkers are among the friendliest urban dwellers you'll meet anywhere in the world, and they take pride in being able to point visitors to to the things that make the city great. Don't be afraid -- they won't bite.


0 comentarios:


Este Blog no tiene fines de lucro, ni propósitos comerciales, el único interés es compartir los gustos y las preferencias de su autor, con personas afines.